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Hoo boy, I'm trying to write a journal entry without beginning with… - Death drives a white Honda Civic
Hoo boy, I'm trying to write a journal entry without beginning with the boring and obvious fact that I neeeever, eeeever write journal entries anymore for some annoying reason [to be discussed later! Unless I decide not to discuss it!], but I just can't seem to do it. Not mentioning it would be like being in a room where a white elephant gift exchange is happening, and not mentioning all the white elephants. In any event: Journal Entry #4 of 2006, here we gooooo...

Yes, number four. Jesus. Anyway! Has anyone ever set foot inside of a Jamba Juice? Me either! In fact, I can safely say that I've never even considered going to Jamba Juice for any reason, nor do I know of anyone who's ever been there. And yet, they abound. They're everywhere a civic debate about gentrification is raging [which is a long way of saying "everywhere"], so clearly they have a lot of customers. But who are these people? [Besides Buster Bluth] Do they have times of the day where they're really busy? Juice rushes? When would this be? Morning? Are Jamba Juice customers wacky health-nut-types who are substituting coffee with juice? Or are Jamba Juice brand juice smoothies [oh god, they probably call them something different and annoying, like Jamba Bombas, or something--not that "smoothie" isn't 100% annoying] considered more of an after dinner beverage, a digestivo? This is a serious mystery, and pertinent because I have a little bet with myself that my prediction of a Jamba Juice appearing on the bottom level of the new condos on 24th and 57th will be woefully true. I also think there will be a Subway, a tanning salon, and a Starbucks. Usually the last one would be a payday loan place, but all the condos here are really striving for this whole "upscale" thing [which should mean "big," but almost always means "swinishly bourgeois"], so Moneytree simply wouldn't do.

Speaking of "upscale," is "flipping" real-estate the present-day equivalent of 1920s stock-market speculation, or what?

And speaking of "speculation," I do believe it's time to end this entry. An entry which has turned out kind of like the first pancake in the batch...
[A "batch" of pancakes? You know what I mean...]
22 comments or Leave a comment
herbaliser From: herbaliser Date: September 22nd, 2006 02:14 am (UTC) (Link)
famousmark From: famousmark Date: September 22nd, 2006 07:39 am (UTC) (Link)
keepthepenny From: keepthepenny Date: September 22nd, 2006 03:52 am (UTC) (Link)
i agree about jamba juice. i always pass it and i feel like "should i be going there? i have no desire for juice but i feel like i must be missing something."

also, "jamba bombas" made me laugh. there's always at least one LOL moment in a mark post.
famousmark From: famousmark Date: September 22nd, 2006 07:49 am (UTC) (Link)
Jamba Juice is one of those things that just bugs me because of the context its always in. If a few of them just kind of cropped up in various different situations, I probably wouldn't give the place a second thought, and miiiight even be curious enough to try it. But it's aaaalways coming in as part of these "look how upscale the neighborhood is getting!" new and horrible strip mall-type retail spaces, and therefore I picture them being full of nothing but businessmen who are really excited about the prospect of cities becoming nothing more than suburbs with more residents.

This shows me to be a bit closed-minded, but then again, it all just goes back to a glass of juice.
counterfeitfake From: counterfeitfake Date: September 22nd, 2006 02:42 pm (UTC) (Link)
Right next to the Qdoba!

Man have you heard the Qdoba radio commercial where the girl talks with food in her mouth?
jakefish From: jakefish Date: September 22nd, 2006 04:51 am (UTC) (Link)
Cerra and I used to go to Jamba Juice ALOT a couple of years ago. The smoothies they sell are really good, and consistant (which is important in a one-trick chain). I can't say we've been recently, and I really don't know why.

The funniest thing about Jamba Jiuce is that they used to have a smoothie call Tsunami-something-or-other, and then they changed the name after the 2004 Tsunami.
famousmark From: famousmark Date: September 22nd, 2006 07:39 am (UTC) (Link)
Press release for Jamba Juice's Tsunami smoothie name change:

"Out of respect for those affected by the tragic natural disaster of this spring, Jamba Juice is renaming its Tsunami smoothie. Jamba Juice wishes to clarify that it is in no way associated with real tsunamis, nor does it in any way condone the actions of the recent tsunami that devastated Thailand and parts of the Indo-Pacific. Jamba Juice wishes that the tsunami were more like their own Tsunami, bursting with fresh fruit flavor, loaded with vitamins and minerals, and supercharged with protein, rather than bursting with drowning, loaded with malaria, and supercharged with countless metric tons of building-decimating force. Jamba Juice also wishes to apologize to anyone who may have been offended by the Tsunami smoothie during the lag-time between the event and the decision to change the name of the drink. The drink formerly known as Tsunami will now be known as the Hurricane; to distinguish it from the alcoholic beverage of the same name, it will also be named after the daughter of Marketing Director Tim Simmonson: Katrina's Hurricane."

Bad-um ching, everyone. Bad-um ching.
counterfeitfake From: counterfeitfake Date: September 22nd, 2006 02:43 pm (UTC) (Link)
Man that is lame, I bet you New Orleans hasn't renamed the Hurricane.
redrobotgirl From: redrobotgirl Date: September 22nd, 2006 04:52 am (UTC) (Link)
The best part about this entry is your use of the word Gentrification to describe the incessance of Jamba Juice. Especially because Gentrification doesn't just mean "abundance of" but specifically, a moving in of a people or culture into an area that forces the current people or culture to abandon its territory and move elsewhere. See: Ballard and Madrona as delicious exampled of poor(black) people being ousted from their homes so rich(white) people could live there.
This delights me indeed.
famousmark From: famousmark Date: September 22nd, 2006 08:05 am (UTC) (Link)
Although in Ballard, it's poor Scandinavians being ousted from their homes.
counterfeitfake From: counterfeitfake Date: September 22nd, 2006 02:45 pm (UTC) (Link)
Seriously, I'm pretty sure there were never any black people in Ballard.
strangea From: strangea Date: September 22nd, 2006 06:27 am (UTC) (Link)
The only time I've been there was when someone got me a "Green Tea" slurpee type concoction. It tasted like I was pooping alfalfa out of my mouth.

I should've got mango. Even mango slurpees are good.

On another Jamba note, it's freaking SURREAL to be in a Jamba Juice during PAC-NW overcast drizzle. The color scheme turns into a blurry nightmare.
famousmark From: famousmark Date: September 22nd, 2006 07:52 am (UTC) (Link)

Also, I don't know--you have to be careful with mango. Mangos are one of the most delicious fruits ever, but sometimes, things purporting to taste like mangos end up tasting like soap. I'm probably thinking of artificial mango flavor, though....

lexiramone From: lexiramone Date: September 22nd, 2006 06:48 am (UTC) (Link)
where have you been? What is new with you? How are you?
famousmark From: famousmark Date: September 22nd, 2006 07:58 am (UTC) (Link)
I've been living in Ballard with my lady, working as a barista, and playing some rock n' roll with my new band! So I've been pretty good, but lately I've had this thing where I've started writing entries, and then I'd get bored of them and delete them halfway through. I almost did that to this one too, except I promised myself I wouldn't when I started writing, and instead I just wrapped it up and clicked 'post'.

How are yoooou? I read you're not working in Southcenter anymore. Woo! Also, you have to tell me who is that picture of in your profile, the one between Jarvis Cocker and Elvis Costello. Someone from the 20s? I'd guess George Gershwin, Cole Porter, or Bix Beiderbecke, but it seems like none of the three.
lexiramone From: lexiramone Date: September 22nd, 2006 08:12 am (UTC) (Link)
I'm so good. I'm so glad not to be working at Southcenter anymore. Capitol Hill is much much more cool. Probably not as cool as Ballard though. I love Ballard.
That fellow sandwiched in between Jarvis and Elvis is the very yummy F Scott Fitzgerald before the booze caught up with him. He is adorable!
Yeah, other than working I'm starting school in about 5 days and still living in the U District with Eric. Nothing has changed.
elizabethxiii From: elizabethxiii Date: September 23rd, 2006 04:23 am (UTC) (Link)
you are living with your lady friend now? no more brothell...i mean, bothell?


ballard rocks.

glad you're in the city now, where you belong.
quent From: quent Date: September 22nd, 2006 06:15 pm (UTC) (Link)
yo, man, speaking of starting writing, are you still looking for a writing job? even if it's boring ol' tech-writing, script writing for videos, etc?

i keep meaning to drop your name for hiring, because I know you're an awesome writer, but only samples I can use to back my statement up would be these LJ entries. And these LJ entries are sometimes (woo, boy!) inappropriate. You should start making some more serious samples to portfolio-ize.

Come to think of it, I think you would rule at Marketing. You'd make awesome fucking slogans and call out any spin bullshit the rest of the marketing people have to offer.

Also, how are you?

Also, I broke up with Sara. Like, holy shit. Sometime we need to hang out.
snowman From: snowman Date: September 24th, 2006 07:22 am (UTC) (Link)
Man, Quentin, I am going to be in Seattle at the beginning of October and would love to get together. If nothing else, we can cry in some beers. Maybe we can rendez-vous in Mark's livejournal--I mean, a bar or coffee shop. Hang in there, man, it gets better. I think.
thingstouchme From: thingstouchme Date: September 22nd, 2006 10:58 pm (UTC) (Link)
I like Jamba Juice and I support substituting it for coffee because not alot of people eat enough fruit and/or vitamins and whatnot, and caffeine and high-calorie coffee drinks are pretty bad for you every day.

I don't go to Jamba Juice instead of getting coffee, though, personally, because it's really not convenient to do so. The times I drink coffee are when I study, or on the way to work. And there are no chairs and tables to sit/study at in a Jamba Juice, and no drive through window. So the replacing isn't imminent.

FURTHERMORE, if you love mangoes, and since you live in Ballard, you should hit up the India Bistro for a mango lassi at some point. YUM.
elizabethxiii From: elizabethxiii Date: September 23rd, 2006 04:22 am (UTC) (Link)


don't hate me for this, but: i've been to jamba juice. they confuse the hell outta me, but when i go to u village i often get something from the one right between storables and *squee* crate and barrel!!!

i know, craziness, but it's true. they are yummy! expensive and confusing as hell, but yummy. and whenever i go in there, the line is almost out the door. totally insane.

sorry to let you down...

but DUDE! i miss you! and i'm going to have a baby, like, ANY DAY! i thought about naming him famousmark but luke didn't think naming him after someone who might be funnier than he is was a good idea, so we abandoned that idea! ;)

i hope you're well, and i really do miss your posts. hopefully your absence means that you are just doing something MUCH MORE worth while with your time! ;)
From: ex_inanna Date: September 25th, 2006 12:55 am (UTC) (Link)
I got a smoothie once in the mall when I was starving. I thought maybe I was suppose to want one. It didn't taste like coffee at all. I didn't go back.
22 comments or Leave a comment